EDITOR’S NOTE: This week I don’t have anything publishable to say so I’ve brought in a guest writer. Griffin works for me as chief vermin chaser and sand box fertilizer. He has a very unique view of the world I hope you enjoy as much as I do.
First of all let me tell you about myself. My two apes-who-bring-food rescued me from the pound about a year ago. I’m mostly Egyptian Mau. I have coal-black fur except for about twenty white hairs on my belly which my female ape thinks “Are just so cute.” Things like being called cute, not to mention many other embarrassments, cause me to keep my aloof attitude that people who don’t like cats use as the reason why. However behind closed doors I do on occasion let my apes know that I think they are tolerable by letting them pet me.
This winter seemed like it would never end. I hate snow. I hate cold wind even more. So for months whenever my ape opened the door I couldn’t understand why he had not made it warm for me yet. But lately I think he’s finally gotten it straightened out. The snow is gone and it’s getting warmer. But every once in a while he screws it up and we have a cold, windy day. For punishment I sneak up behind him at his desk and I put my claws in his back until he plays chase the red laser dot or chase the feathers-on-a-stick.
My apes have given me a big garden to play in which I have to share with my roommate Roswell, the Maine Coon. I spend a lot of time there but sometimes the squirrels always seem plumper on the other side of the fence. So I have a tendency to wander. Whenever I cross the concrete strip my apes call after me telling to come back. I look at them and ignore them. When I do finally come back one ape will say, “Dammit cat, you’ve only got nine of them. Don’t waste them in the street.” I don’t understand what that means. Do you?
So that pretty much tells you about me in general. My apes say that to help earn my Purina I have to tell about some of my adventures so once in a while the cat lovers out there may be in for a treat. Sorry in advance for dog lovers. There probably won’t be much positive press about dogs.