I know I watch too much television. Sometimes my dreams are just a jumbled continuation of what I was watching earlier. But I seriously don’t know why I should dream of being a prisoner in a Chinese prison camp. All I know is the way we escaped may just be the answer to world peace. Continue reading “How I Broke Out of a Chinese Prison Camp”
Some of the latest polls are showing the two leaders in the over-loaded republican roll call for presidential candidates are Jeb Bush and Donald Trump. I don’t think there’s any way we can find two guys farther away from the each other on the personality spectrum. On one side we have Bush who can’t figure out a simple thing like whether he wants to be associated with his own family or not. On the other end is Trump who has an opinion on everything and says it whether people are gonna agree or not. I don’t have much to say about Bush – yet, but Trump is causing more ruckus than a smoke bomb in a boy’s school bathroom and I have to chime in with just a few words. Continue reading “The Trump Troubles”
The other night I was watching a neighborhood display of pre-fourth-of-July fireworks that were too loud and too close. I never was one much for the pretty “flowers in the sky” this time of year but I’ll be honest, when I was young I used to love this time of year to blow shit up. I’ve destroyed more model cars and spaceships than you could shake a roman candle at. We even blew up the starship Enterprise one year. We called it Star Trek III: The Home Game. Continue reading “We Need a New Fourth of July Tradition”
If you don’t believe in gay marriage then the simple solution is don’t marry a gay.
It’s three weeks until another election day and while watching TV this month its impossible not to see all the ads about political candidates. It makes me wish fondly for the days with breaks full of used cars and Cialis commercials. I’m sure we’ll be getting back to those soon after the elections along with commercials full of cheery and hurried people trying to fulfill their empty dreams of Christmas.
In the mean time these political commercials remind us that everyone needs to get out and vote. That way there are more people that we can use to spread the blame wider and thinner for putting these jerks in office. Wider and thinner – just like spackling over a bad joint in drywall.
In the long run it won’t make a lot of difference how many citizens vote or who eventually gets in to office anyway after some court finally decides the winner. I’ve voted for over 40 years and all I can think of it must be my fault. I’m doing something wrong when I vote because everything in politics seems to just keep getting worse and worse.
It’s supposed to be easy to vote for the right guy. After all one of the slogans reminds us that voting is as easy as driving. You use ‘R’ to go backwards and ‘D’ to go forward. If that’s the case why do we keep picking the guy that drives the car through the back wall of the garage and over the swing set in the backyard? We can only hope that no children are playing on the swing set when he hits it.
Well since this is the way we know things work and it’s better than most of the other systems in the world, let’s give the candidates one more chance. Even if you think it doesn’t matter who you vote for – just get out and vote.